


The Thing at the Place with the Stuff

by ReindeerUnicornEleventy3



Series: Prompts [1]
Category: Wynonna Earp (TV)
Genre: F/F, M/M, Purgatory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-23
Updated: 2018-08-23
Packaged: 2019-07-01 07:38:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,961
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15769563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReindeerUnicornEleventy3/pseuds/ReindeerUnicornEleventy3
Summary: Waverly takes something important from the police station. Nicole is the first to find out. But can they keep the secret from Wynonna?





	The Thing at the Place with the Stuff

Nicole searched every drawer in her desk. She overturned wastepaper baskets, checked evidence lockers, even raided Nedley’s file cabinet. Nothing. It wasn’t anywhere. She approached the briefcase lying on her desk for about the fourteenth time that morning. She entered the combo and flicked it open. Nothing. It was empty. The money order worth $20,000 was gone. The low grade panic that had been smoldering inside her for hours now burned quickly up her veins until it reached her head and made her dizzy. Just then, Waverly trotted in, with two tall coffees. She seemed extra peppy this morning and she hadn’t even taken a sip of her coffee yet.  
“Iced Caramel Macchiato for my lady.” Waverly said cheerily, setting the coffee on Nicole’s desk, “and a Pumpkin Spice Cappuccino for me.”  
Waverly flipped her full-bodied brown hair over her shoulder as she wrapped her glossed lips around her coffee straw. She noticed Nicole wasn’t paying attention, but was leaning over the briefcase looking pale and scared.  
“Baby, what’s wrong?” Waverly asked.  
Nicole took a breath.  
“Something important is missing.” She exhaled.  
“What is it?”  
“Something of Wynonna’s.” Nicole’s voice shook a tad.  
“Like what?” Waverly inquired.  
“Something she gave to me for safekeeping. And I lost it. And now she is going to murder me.” She said with a strange coolness, trying against all odds to stay calm and not pass out.  
“Well, don’t worry, we’ll find it. Where was the last place you saw it?”  
“In this briefcase.” Nicole slunk down into her desk chair.  
Waverly’s face suddenly dropped.”Um, this, briefcase, babe? Not, like, another briefcase?”  
Nicole looked up at her. “Waverly, what do you know?”  
“ Uhhh, nothing. This coffee is really good.” She squeaked and gulped her drink.  
“Waverly.” Nicole said sternly.  
“Okay, there was a money order for $20,000.” She admitted.  
“ Uh, yes, there was.” Nicole said, surprised. “Do you know where it went? Did someone-  
“ I took it!” Waverly blurted out.  
“What? Waverly? How?” Nicole was utterly confused.  
“I overheard Nedley on the phone. He said something about a money order so yesterday, when you were out on patrol, I snuck in and opened the briefcase, took the money, and left.” She said all panicky.  
“How did you know the combo?” Nicole asked.  
“80085 isn’t that hard of a code to crack, Nicole.”  
Nicole looked defeated, “I can’t believe you did this!”  
“Look, Nicole, I’m sorry. I hate dishonesty and I would have never have done it if I hadn’t needed to. ” She was on the edge of tearing up.  
Nicole stared at her, unsure of what to do with this beautiful, wonderful being.  
“ But why would you steal someone else’s money! That is really wrong, babe.”  
“ I had a plan to pay it back!” Waverly pleaded.  
“ How much of it did you spend?” Officer Haught was back on her feet.  
“Some.” Waverly said.  
“Ok we can replace some.” Nicole said, ready to be practical again.  
“Ok, all of it. I spent all of it. ” Waverly winced.  
“All of it! How do you spend $20,000... in Purgatory?” Nicole exclaimed.  
“Okay, Okay. So you remember my friend from high school?”  
“B-train?” Nicole asked.  
“No. The park ranger? You met him last week.”  
“Yes. The one that’s really into trees.”  
“Yes. Perry. That’s him.” Waverly said excitedly. “Remember he was so into trees that he drank some of that murder tree blood and got really sick?”  
“Yes.” Nicole repeated.  
“Well, he needed an operation.”  
“So you gave the money to him.” Nicole sighed.  
“Yes. And now he’s better. And Jeremy is happy.” Waverly smiled. “And I told him to stay away from murder trees from now on!” She nervously laughed.  
Nicole came over and kissed her head. “That’s really sweet.” She said, pulling Waverly in close. “Wynonna is still going to kill me though.”  
Nicole left her girlfriend’s arms to pace around her desk.  
“No she won’t. She loves Jeremy.”  
“I don’t know about that. I think tolerate is a better description of her feelings toward him.” Nicole said, “Besides, the money was probably for Alice’s college fund or something.”  
“Oh, shit. You’re probably right.” Waverly said fearfully. “We are terrible aunties!”  
“Well, I mean, you put the money to good cause. You saved a man’s life.”  
Nicole smiled warmly. Waverly returned the smile.  
“Ok, what are we going to do?” Waverly said.  
“Well, there is no good way to make $20,000 fast.” Nicole sighed.  
“We could put on a fundraiser at Shorty’s. Have a go-go night,with half-priced drinks and a dance show, starring me!” She twirled around.  
Nicole had a hard time watching her without getting turned on.  
“I’m not sure if that’s a good idea.” Nicole smiled, staring into Waverly’s soft dark eyes.  
“Why not? My coyote ugly game is on point.” She said, still dancing.  
“I know. But your coyote ugly game is only for me.” Nicole approached Waverly, grabbed her mid-twirl, then kissed her on the mouth. Waverly pulled away.  
“ Fine. How about this? We open a savings account at the bank for Alice and we deposit some money into it every chance we get.” Waverly suggested.  
“That’s a start. But what do I get for my charitable donation? A go-go dance?” Nicole smiled slyly and came after Waverly. Not being turned on was a lost cause at this point.  
Waverly laughed and blocked Nicole’s roaming hands. “No. You get to not be killed by Wynonna and you ensure that our niece gets a good education.”  
“I mean, those are good things too.” Nicole agreed.  
“And maybe some private go-go dances, later.” Waverly wrapped her arms around Nicole’s neck and began kissing her. But after a few minutes she stopped.  
“Oh, shit! We are suppose to meet Wynonna at Shorty’s. Let’s go before she gets suspicious!” Waverly pecked Nicole on the cheek and ran out the door.  
A few minutes later, they arrive at the bar in Waverly’s car.  
“Okay, let’s just play it cool and everything will be okay.” Nicole said as they got out of the car.  
“Sure, play it cool. We’re really good at that.” Waverly said with a tinge of sarcasm as they walked into the bar.  
When they entered, Wynonna could be seen behind the bar, lip-syncing to the Backstreet Boys song that blared through the speakers. Doc was on the other side of the bar, grooming his mustache in a handheld mirror.  
“ Baby girl! And her lover! How goes it?” Wynonna exclaimed.  
Nicole and Waverly smiled politely and cautiously approached the bar.  
“Oh, you know. Same old. Same old.” Waverly chuckled.  
“Anything of interest happening down at the old sheriff's station, Officer Haught. Any missing persons or what have you?”  
“ Oh no. Nothing. No one. No one is missing, nope. Heh.” She said nervously.  
“It’s about damn time,” said Wynonna. “I feel like everyday someone is being kidnapped.”  
“And it’s usually one of us.” Waverly mentioned.  
“Word, Waves.” Wynonna finished her drink.  
“Who wants more whiskey?” Wynonna asked and they all agreed to one.  
With whiskeys in hand they all rose their glasses for a toasts.  
“For all of us being here and not being kidnapped.” Wynonna recited.  
“And for no more banana schnapps!” Said a voice.  
Everyone turned toward it. Standing in between Waverly and Nicole, grinning the widest grin in the history of grinning, was Jeremy.  
“Jeremy! Oh look babe, it’s Jeremy.” Waverly laughed, sort of hysterically.  
“I’ll cheers to that.” Wynonna said, and everyone’s glasses clinked.  
Waverly downed her drink unusually fast.  
“Whoa there, baby girl. Everything okay?”  
“Oh yeah, never better!” Waverly smiled. Nicole looked at her nervously.  
“Glad everything is good at the station, Haught. Everything in order. Everything….ship shape.”  
“Heh, yeah. Every-everything sure is good.” She stammered.  
“Jeremy!” Wynonna shouted quite vigorously, “A little bird told me that your boy toy was out of the hospital.”  
“Doing better, is he?” Doc asked.  
“Yes! It was a miracle! I can’t believe-” Jeremy began.  
“Can’t believe he’s out so soon. Modern medicine...am I right?” Nicole downed her drink. Everyone looked at her skeptically.  
“ So the operation went smoothly?” Wynonna asked.  
“Mmm-hmmm” Jeremey nodded.  
“You knew about the operation?” Waverly squeaked.  
“Yup. I know alot of things, Wayhaught. Many things. Even things that people don’t want me to know.” Wynonna’s eyes shifted glaringly between the two women. She drowned her drink and set it loudly down on the bar. Nicole and Waverly exchanged nervous glances.  
“I’m just so happy he’s okay.” Jeremy said.  
“Who drinks tree-blood? ” Doc asked, utterly confused.  
“ He’s adventurous.” Jeremey said.  
Doc looked at him incredulously.  
“Ok, he was trying to be a good park ranger.”  
Doc’s stare continues.  
“Ok, it wasn’t his brightest moment.” Jeremy sighed.  
“Why do people do what they do? Why do people drink tree-blood? Why are there murder trees? Why do people take things that don’t belong to them?” Wynonna makes her way around the bar and struts over to Wayhaught.  
“We have to go!” Waverly blurted out.  
“Uh, yeah.” Nicole said.  
“ Where to?” Wynonna asked.  
“ Well..?” Nicole began, looking to Waverly for help.  
“ We got that thing!” Waverly exclaimed, pointing at Nicole.  
“Oh yeah, the thing!” Nicole said.  
“The thing at the place.” Waverly continued. She got up out of her seat. Nicole followed suit.  
“Oh yeah, the thing at the place with the stuff.” Nicole said.  
Wynonna wasn’t buying it.  
“Well, it was nice seeing you. Bye!” Waverly said and ran to the door, pulling Nicole by the hand.  
“Are they going to go have sex?” Jeremy asked Doc, sorta confused.  
“I have no idea. But I reckon it’s a good guess.” Doc replies and takes a sip of whisky.  
Wynonna sprints after them. “Wait. I need to tell you something.” She catches them midway through the door and puts her arms around both of them.  
“I know you took my money.” She whispered.  
“Waverly did! Not me.” Nicole said.  
“Babe!” Waverly whined.  
“Sorry.”  
“Okay, so although I’m mega pissed that you took my money without asking, I’m glad you used it to save Jeremy’s boyfriend. It really shows how you unicorns stick together. You know as a pack.” Her faces wrinkles in thought, “ a pack?”  
“ A flock?” Waverly asked.  
“Herd? I think it’s herd.” Nicole said.  
“Yeah that sounds right.” Waverly said.  
“Anyways, back to being mega-pissed.” Wynonna said.  
“Look, Wynonna I’m sorry. I didn’t know what else to do. Nicole and I are going to earn the money back.”  
“Oh, you are going to start go-go dancing at Pussy Willows?” Wynonna asked.  
“See, I told you.” Waverly looks at Nicole.  
“No. We are opening a bank account for Alice.” Nicole replied.  
“Good idea. Now don’t ever steal from me again, and don’t tell Jeremy it was my money that saved his dumbass, blood-drinking boyfriend.”  
“Aw, but you love Jeremy, Wynonna.” Waverly cooed.  
“I tolerate him.” Wynonna said.  
“Told you.” Nicole looked at Waverly.  
“Okay now you two get the hell out of here and do your thing at the place with the stuff. Which usually means sex. We all know it’s sex.” She shoved the couple out of the bar and returned smiling to Doc and Jeremy.  
Outside, Waverly and Nicole are stunned.  
“Well, that went better than expected.” Nicole said.  
“Yeah, I won’t ever do that again. I mean, without letting her know first.” Waverly said.  
“Yeah, I think we need to do the other thing she suggested too.”  
“What? The thing with the stuff?” Waverly said.  
“ Yeah. Don’t you think so?”  
“Yeah I mean obviously. Come on. I’ll drive us to the station.”  
“The station?”  
“Yeah it’s the place with the stuff, right? Like handcuffs?”  
“What are we waiting for!” Nicole sprints to the car.  
They jump in the car and drive off.


End file.
